A Submissive Journey with Chastity: Overcoming Challenges and Finding Comfort

Hi, Brax here. If you’re reading this, you might be going through your own struggles with chastity, and trust me, I’ve been there. Over the past few years, I’ve faced a lot of hurdles, both physically and mentally. I’d like to share some of the most challenging experiences I’ve had with chastity and how I’ve overcome them. Maybe my story will resonate with you, whether you're new to this or have been locked up for years.

The Physical Struggles: Chafing, Irritation, and Finding the Right Fit

When I first started with chastity, I thought a larger cage would be more comfortable—it seemed logical at the time. However, as my body reacted to being locked up, I quickly realized this was a mistake. My penis would expand and contract throughout the day, and the extra space in the larger cage caused a lot of friction. The constant movement led to chafing, especially around the base ring and where the cage pressed against the tip. Moisturizer helped to a degree, but it was only a temporary fix.

The real solution came when I switched to smaller cages. I experimented with different designs and sizes before finally settling on a couple that worked for me, including the Nano ResinLock™ Black Edition and a Mini Steel cage. The smaller, snugger fit prevented unnecessary movement, significantly reducing irritation. I also found that keeping the cage clean was much easier with a design that didn't trap moisture or dirt, which helped a lot in the long-term comfort.

Finding the right fit was the key to solving my issues. If you’re struggling with chafing or discomfort, my advice would be to experiment with smaller cages. It’s also important to remember that everyone’s anatomy is different—what works for me might not work for you, and that’s okay. Keep trying different designs until you find what feels best.

The Mental Hurdles: Sub Drop and Managing Expectations

One of the biggest mental challenges I’ve faced is Sub Drop. If you’re unfamiliar with the term, it refers to the emotional low that can happen after intense submission or after a release, especially if it doesn’t live up to the build-up or expectations. Early on, after spending days or even weeks locked up, I’d finally get the chance to orgasm, and instead of feeling satisfied, I’d feel this unexpected drop in mood. It’s a bit like the come-down after an emotional high—disappointing, confusing, and sometimes even isolating.

At first, I didn’t understand what was happening. I thought I was the only one going through this, and it was tough to talk about. But after a lot of open conversations with Addison, we started to figure out ways to manage these feelings together. Communication was key—she helped me express what I was feeling, and we started incorporating aftercare routines into our dynamic. Things like cuddling, gentle touch, affirmations, and just spending time together after a release helped ground me and soften the emotional crash.

If you’re dealing with Sub Drop, don’t be afraid to talk to your partner about it. Your keyholder might not know how you’re feeling, especially if you’re keeping it to yourself. Communication and aftercare can make all the difference.

Accepting My Role as a Sub: Letting Go of Control

Coming to terms with my role as a submissive was another major hurdle. For a long time, I struggled with the idea that being submissive somehow made me weaker, or less in control of the relationship. I’d grown up with a lot of stereotypical ideas about masculinity and power, and it was hard to reconcile those with my desire to be locked in chastity and submit to Addison.

It took time—and a lot of introspection—to accept that submission didn’t mean losing control. In fact, it was about surrendering control in a way that was fulfilling for both of us. Being a sub didn’t mean I was powerless or unimportant in our relationship. In fact, it allowed me to focus more on Addison’s needs and desires, which in turn deepened our connection.

Learning to give, rather than always wanting to receive, was a shift in mindset for me. It’s not easy to unlearn years of societal conditioning, but embracing my submissive role has been incredibly rewarding. If you’re struggling with this, I encourage you to take your time. Don’t rush into it, and don’t feel pressured to conform to anyone else’s expectations. Your submission should be about what feels right for you and your partner.

Overcoming Fears: Wearing the Cage in Public

Wearing my chastity cage in public was a huge source of anxiety for me at first. What if someone noticed? What if I had to explain why I was locked? These thoughts ran through my head constantly, especially in the early days. I’d find myself adjusting my clothes, worrying about the outline of the cage, or the sound of the lock clinking. It made me self-conscious and hyper-aware of everything around me.

But over time, I started to realize that most people aren’t paying attention. My fears were largely in my head. As I became more comfortable in the cage, my anxiety started to fade. Finding a discreet cage like the ResinLock helped too—it’s lightweight, easy to wear under clothes, and virtually invisible unless you know what you’re looking for. Now, wearing my cage in public is just part of my routine. I don’t think about it nearly as much as I used to, and the initial fear has turned into a quiet confidence.

If you’re dealing with public anxiety, know that you’re not alone. It’s completely normal to feel nervous, especially when you’re new to chastity. The best advice I can give is to take it slow—start by wearing your cage in safe, comfortable environments before venturing out into more public spaces. Over time, it will start to feel more natural.

Final Thoughts: Embrace the Journey

Chastity has been a journey for me, both physically and mentally. I’ve faced challenges with discomfort, Sub Drop, accepting my submissive role, and wearing the cage in public. But through it all, I’ve learned so much about myself and my relationship with Addison. Finding the right fit with a cage, communicating openly, and embracing my role as a sub have all been key to making this experience fulfilling and enjoyable.

If you’re just starting out or struggling with your own chastity journey, my advice is simple: don’t give up. It’s okay to face challenges and it’s okay to take your time. The more you experiment and learn about what works for you, the more rewarding the experience can be.

Feel free to explore other tips and experiences on our blog, and remember—this journey is about you and your partner. Take it one step at a time, and you’ll find what works for you.